What Heartbreak Can Teach You

Getting over a heartbreak can cause an emotional overdrive. They hit you hard and it’s overwhelming. Their blows are tough enough to make you crumble.

They say love and pain go hand-in-hand, and you would never know one without the other. Just remember that getting hurt is an indication that you genuinely love the person.

“But is the pain necessary?”

If you’ve recently gone through despair, you might have asked this yourself quite a few times. So, is it really? Here are a few things you learn after going through heartbreak:

Love shouldn’t be taken lightly.

When we fall in love, it’s all smooth and easy — it feels as if nothing could go wrong. It’s supposed to stay that way regardless of how hard life hits. However, most people take it carelessly. They often neglect it as time passes. That’s when things start to go wrong.

When you find someone you can’t imagine your life without, take care of it. Don’t mistreat something that rarely comes by.

Feelings are unreliable.

When you decide on something big, don’t trust your “guts” or “instincts.” These may be the biggest factors in your choices, but they’re not reliable. Most times, they are wrong.

Look at situations objectively. Ask the right questions, and look into the right sources. Your feelings may be valid from the time you felt them, but they’re not always accurate.

You are enough.

Say it with me, “I am enough.” Don’t let any miseries tell you otherwise. This is the takeaway that you should remember after every suffering. I know that heartbreak left you crushed and soulless, but that doesn’t make you any less valuable.

Some doors should stay shut.

I know it’s tempting to let them in again. Even though you’re also hurting, you feel horrible watching them in such anguish and want to take them back.

Don’t listen to that. Only then will you realize that feelings are fleeting. Prioritize your healing more than anything.

Love alone isn’t always enough.

This might just be the hardest pill to swallow. You fought so hard for that relationship to work out, thinking you can still make it with love alone. Tragically, that isn’t always how things go.

When you pursue a relationship, maintain trust and respect. Trust that you will make it through all obstacles that come your way and respect each other even in times of disagreement.

Your mental health should be well-taken care of.

Your mental health affects your emotional and physical health. When you don’t feel good mentally — you drown yourself in self-deprecating thoughts — this affects your emotional stability. When you’re not emotionally healthy, you tend to neglect your physical health. So be gentle with yourself. I know it’s heavy and excruciating, but good and better times will come.

Don’t Lose Yourself.

Amidst the suffering, never succumb to the pain. It may seem like it would go on forever, but there’s actually an end to all of it.

I understand that it’s not easy to see through the smoke and dust, and you’re not patient enough for the fire to settle. But once the discomfort fades away, your delight will never compare to the agony that you had to wait out.

Heartbreaks will shatter and build you. You don’t have to choose what’s destined to happen. After every damage, there is restoration. Trust the process.